Into the Desert

purgatory island   

Lough Derg, the sacred Sanctuary of St Patrick also known as Purgatory Island

Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the desert to be tempted by the devil. Matthew 4:1

After what has happened to me I know the Lord is leading me.  But I have to be honest here, this week was extremely hard for various reasons.  I found it hard to pray.  I was even plagued with doubt.  I had physical ailments that manifested.  There was fighting in my family.  How could this be?  Lord, I am certain you are leading me.  It was with discipline that I was able to keep up prayer.  I am making a consecration to Mary.  Why are these things happening?  I sat in the chapel and poured my heart out.  Remove me from this desert Lord, I feel so dry.  Here is what He said;


LET GO.  You cling to too much control instead of clinging to Me.  In this things seem hard.  These things you experience, they all pass through My Hands first.  Don’t you see yet?  I am stripping you in order to build you up.  LET GO.  Trust me.  Penance, penance, penance, this is part of your purifiation.  Do what I ask, let go of the rest.

Your Abba.

About veilofveronica

I am a mother and wife as well as an RCIA and Adult Faith Formation catechist at a parish in the south. I have 3 children and a great husband.
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12 Responses to Into the Desert

  1. If you were beside me, I’d put my arms around you and hug you and hold you close. Something told me you were not well but I thought I was imagining it. I’m so sorry I was not a better friend.

    I stopped by your blog in some excitement to share something with you. Imagine my utter shock to see the title of your newest post.

    At the end of August, on my 2nd day of the Luisa Piccarreta novena, I heard this voice say to me – Blow the Spirit of My Mother into the realms where work is needed.
    Good souls have tried in earnest to help me understand, and to a certain extent it became clear: I WAS OVERLY CONTROLLING MY PRAYER DIRECTION; I NEEDED TO LET GO, AND LET MOTHER MARY TAKE OVER.

    So, I tried to obey.

    In another blog, with reference to the Illumination / Storm / Warning and Triumph, I had written this – I sometimes wonder if the timeline so many seek differs for each soul. I suddenly felt that the storm would have different dimensions, and it would assail us at our weakest points. Some time back, I had a feeling that today’s Feast – Triumph of the Holy Cross – would mark the beginning of Trial. Back then, I wondered if it would be for us all or just for me. And then, I forgot about it.

    Today, Triumph of the Holy Cross. I know, it has begun for me. By morning, I could feel something had changed. The lightheartedness and the optimism of the past year was slowly seeping out. I went to church today for some quiet time. Looked at Christ on the Cross, and thanked Him for His gift of faith to me. Felt a relief at a strange unburdening. Once outside, I began to sense a drying at the edges. But I dismissed it.

    I began to sense a growing aridity within me with the passing hours. By late evening, Susan, it was a full blown storm, invisible to all but me. I honestly staggered against its strength. No other external manifestation or cause. At the height of it, a sudden prayer slipped into me – Mother Mary, into Your hands I commend my spirit. I have never heard of that prayer. All I know is that it must have come from the Cross, and I must pray it.

  2. God's Child says:

    To “Be not afraid”…we must “Be not alone”.
    You are an example of humility and vulnerability to me. “Carry on” with my prayer that your spirits “stay calm” while our storms rage. We have our families and each other to live for.
    Please carry a special intention with you to your quite prayer places for my daughter and her family. She is at a turbulent place in her life. I trust the intervention of our Blessed Mother and the mercy of God, our Father, until the Triumph arrives at the right time for her.
    Thank you for this site and the honest comfort that it brings.
    God’s Child

  3. Dear God’s Child,
    You wrote God’s words. The moment I read them, I knew peace. I too will definitely pray for your daughter.

  4. vanessa joy says:

    Thank you for your beautiful post. I too had moments this past week of severe dryness wondering why I was not being delivered after all I prayed deliverance and protection prayers in the morning, The proverbial moment happened and the day spiraled out of control and I shot prayers of praise and thanksgiving but only felt alone with an acute painful awareness of my lack of trust in God as I shouted out to God with tears of frustration rolling down my mascara stained cheeks. Do you hear me? A still small voice enveloped my soul. “Trust and obey for there is no other way “… Let go of my way of me trying to figure it out, blame my husband, or lament over what if’s ,….
    awake my soul awake! God has not abandoned you in your painful realizations of what could have been and what has been.
    Jesus I trust in you.

    • Jesus I trust in you. Amen.

    • Dear Vanessa Joy,
      There’s something I have learned slowly over the years, and that is that every shout of ours, every lament, every whine – is a form of prayer, simply because it means we are at heaven’s door. After a time, that type of prayer will evolve into something deeper. Many years before I faced marital struggles, and I was told the same by God: Obey! He led me down a path I never would have imagined taking. But I did, and today, my husband is my best friend and my marriage brings me great joy.

      It was obedience that wrought it all. I hope I’ve learned that lesson well.

  5. God's Child says:

    Caitlynnegrace, thank you for adding prayers for my daughter and her family to yours. You and Vanessa Joy have been in mine. Let me just say that she and her husband have been apart. They just returned from a miraculous weekend and have hope for their marriage for the first time in several years. God answers prayers in his own time if we are open to his grave and ask humbly.
    Sometimes “all must be taken away so that ALL can be given”.
    With love and prayers,
    God’s Child

  6. Dear God’s Child, I know the joy of hope, however minuscule to human eyes. It fills and stretches the soul to soaring heights. It is so heartening that you and your family have that today.

  7. Pingback: Look with eyes of Faith | Veil of Veronica

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