Trust in the LORD with all your heart, on your own intelligence do not rely; In all your ways be mindful of him, and he will make straight your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6
My friend Ashley Blackburn and I wrote this meditation on how to Trust. It’s a bit of a reworking of an earlier journal entry. We wrote it as if Mary is speaking to you. Personally.
I am here to speak to you about letting go. As I told Juan Deigo,
Listen and let it penetrate your heart…do not be troubled or weighed down with grief. Do not fear any illness or vexation, anxiety or pain. Am I not here who am your Mother? Are you not under my shadow and protection? Am I not your fountain of life? Are you not in the folds of my mantle? In the embrace of my arms? Is there anything else you need?
All of these feelings and emotions that you feel, I have felt. I am human like you. But I urge you to trust. The Father loves you, He desires what is best for you, He holds you in the palm of His hand and nothing can penetrate His grip. But you must accept His loving care for you because He does not force it upon you. In cooperation with His Will, He asks us to trust in Him- allowing Him to work miracles in your life.
In any of your Great trials I am here to lead you to my Son. It is my greatest joy to bring souls to Him and place them into His loving arms. Because I know how much he desires for you to receive His love… to truly receive His unconditional love.
Through my sorrows it has been revealed to the world how to trust in God.
As Simeon revealed to us in the temple, when Jesus was a mere infant, that a sword would pierce my heart, I continued to keep my eyes on my precious baby that God had given us. I couldn’t give in to fear and worry, wondering what he meant and when the suffering would come. No, I had to fix my eyes on Jesus and give my heart to the Lord, trusting that He would provide me a sufficient amount of grace to endure whatever was to come.
We were refugees who had to flee our home land and go to a foreign place knowing no one, not even speaking the language. How I longed to bring our new baby boy back to Nazareth in order to meet our family and friends, so we could start our life together as a family. But God was once again asking me to trust in Him. He was leading us and guiding us on this journey, although uncertain and unknown at the time. And we were not disapointed, God provided. Knowing my baby Son’s life was in danger, God was our protector. And in the fullness of time His loving care for us was revealed.
When my Son was lost and in the Temple, Joseph and I searched for him with great anxiety, but I did not let it shake my trust in God. I did not let those feelings overtake me and make me lose sight of the Father’s love for me. Although we feared that we may have lost Jesus forever, we continued searching and found Him “in His Fathers House”. What joy we experienced in that moment when our eyes finally met His and we knew he was safe.
As I walked the way of the Cross with Him, seeing my own Son bloodied and beaten, suffering, my emotions were full. Where were the other apostles? only John was there to witness these horrific events. How could these men be so brutal? My Son was innocent. But somehow I remained faithful to the Lord and tried my best to console my Son.
When I met Jesus at Calvary as they nailed Him to the Cross, I could see the angst in His eyes and feel the pain of His wounds. My heart aches as I watched Him suffer. There was nothing I could do. Nothing I could say. It was out of my control. But I trusted. Even in this moment Our Heavenly Father was present. Although I couldn’t see it at the time… a resurrection was coming.
Standing at the foot of the Cross as he told John to take me into his home, I knew He was nearing His final breath. He breathed his last and then He died, my Son… my innocent Son, the Son of God, my Savior. The unspeakable had just happened and I could no longer carry the load of emotions i was bearing on my shoulders. In my agony, I handed it over to God, fully trusting in Him.
When I received My Son’s lifeless body in my arms and held Him remembering his birth and seeing his death, I trusted. I wanted to stay in this moment forever, never letting go of Him. But I knew I had to move on. He was gone and I would miss Him so much. I turned my gaze toward Heaven and begged the Father to give me the strength to go on. And although the strength was not given immediately upon my request, I was able to take the next step in hopeful anticipation.
I remembered the prophecy of Simeon, that a sword would pierce my soul, as I saw them wrap up and prepare my Sons pierced body for burial. What care they took in doing this. What Love they demonstrated as they honored the beauty and sanctity of human life. A moment of peace rushed through me as I lifted my heart to thank the Lord.
I did not try to control my situation.
You may feel right now as if you are walking toward Calvary, carrying many sorrows and burdens. I know what that feels like.
Oh the sorrow, I felt! But Simeon had foretold that my Son was a light to reveal God to all the nations, so even as I laid Him in the tomb, even in my intense sorrow, I trusted. I trusted because I saw LOVE HIMSELF in my Son and I like John, rested in the bosom of the Father. The Father knew me, and I Him. The Father know’s you too, Do you know the Father? Talk to him in your prayer. True Love really does conquer all. Love more than a mere feeling love is a choice. Choose to love. When we sacrifice for the sake of love, we come to know truth. The truth of my son. And in knowing truth and living love your sorrow will give way to Joy.
How can I tell you all this, because I know God’s plan was better. It brought Resurrection. God’s dreams for you are bigger than your own. In the upper room, I did not get upset with my Son’s Apostles for abandoning Him at the Cross. Instead I prayed for them, knowing that the Father holds all in His hands. Whoever has upset you or wronged you, whatever offenses you have held onto, forgive them, let them go. Give the control to God. When you do this you will see the Holy Spirit come upon you as He came upon us in the upper room where the church was birthed.
Remember to trust even if it feels like there is reason not to. Don’t let your feelings be used by the evil one. One of the lies Satan is whispering in our ears is that we are in control, we can do it ourselves, we have no need for a Savior. But I am your Mother, and I tell you to let go and give it to the Father. The Father in heaven truly wants to prosper you and not harm you. Whatever suffering bogs you down, hand it over. Whatever sin is keeping you in chains, I ask the Holy Spirit to reveal it to you in this moment so you can confess it and be free. Just as my Son came to you through me, it is through me, that I bring you to Him, always interceding because I love you.
Right here, right now, in this place, I ask the Holy Spirit, my spouse, to pour himself over you so that you will know now, that whatever you are going through, or whatever may come in the days, weeks, months and years ahead, you can walk in total Trust. With my Son, your yoke will be easy and your burden light. You have HIM. Marked by your baptism, sealed with the Spirit at Confirmation, secured in your willful consent. Your heart beating with His, beating with mine. His Sacred. Mine Immaculate. Yours Beloved. In the Name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.