The Offering

Posted on March 9, 2019 by veilofveronica

pieta

THIRTEENTH STATION
Jesus is taken down from the Cross and given to his Mother

Over the past few years whenever we come upon the season of Lent I always try to ask the Lord and what exactly is it that HE wants me to do for Lent.  This is because a couple of years back there was a time I was doing so many devotions I was overwhelmed and exhausted.  One day just before Lent a few years ago, when I was angsting over what else I should be doing, I was sitting in the chapel and suddenly the Lord told me to “stop it.”  I was shocked.  “Lord, you want me to STOP my devotions?”  He replied, “you’re trying to earn my love but you already have it.  You never lost it.  Listen to me and I will guide your Lent.” I cried in thanksgiving, realizing once again that I was trying to save myself instead of letting Him be my Savior.

This began another turning point in my prayer.  You see, I love Him so much I wanted to make all of these sacrifices,  but I was doing it of my own accord, without consulting Him.  That Lent became very fruitful for me because most of what I ended up doing (besides the Rosary which I commit to daily) was just sitting in the chapel talking to him.  I let him guide my prayer.  On certain days he would lead me to a particular devotion or scripture passage for that day, and other days we just sat;  And He wrapped His arms around me.  It was here in these intimate moments with my divine spouse that I felt the most revelation pour over me.  I have noticed that many of us, myself included, who know the truths of the church and are actually trying to follow them, sometimes we do things out of fear instead of out of love and this fear brings about a spirit of control.  This spirit will exhaust you and wear you out.  Consult the Lord in all you do because this brings peace, not exhaustion.  It also brings joy even and especially in the midst of the storm surrounding the church.  The institutional church seems to be spiraling out of control with scandals and infighting, and yet, in the midst of it, I have never felt closer to God.  This is because of surrender.  I cannot control the scandals, nor punish for them, and so I just have to let go, pray, and trust.  Jesus I trust in you.  I feel 100% certain that God is a way better savior than me (lol).   I will not lose my faith because of the scandal of men.  I believe the Lord when He says;

Beloved, do not look for revenge but leave room for the wrath; for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay,”says the Lord.  Romans 12:19

This passage goes on to say;

Rather, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals upon his head.” Do not be conquered by evil but conquer evil with good. Romans 12:20-21

So who am I that I should doubt the Lord?  I will continue to treat people with love (hopefully).

So here we are today, and I still just before starting Lent ask the Lord what He wants me to do.  This Lent He wanted me to focus on the sorrows of His Mother, which I have spoken about before along with meditation on His Holy Face.  The sorrows of His Mother who walked the path to Calvary with Him, this is a powerful devotion.

I have a peaceful place in my home where I go to pray:

Peaceful place

I kneel in front of His Holy Face and I pray the Chaplet of Sorrows.  Y’all can see the box of tissue on the floor, something I have needed quite a bit lately.   This prayer has become immensely intense for me.  I sometimes, in between each chaplet, cry and lament my sorrow to Christ and His Mother for the sins of the world.  And Mary showed me something yesterday.  She showed me herself standing at the foot of the Cross with John and the women.  She showed me herself holding the Body of her Dead Son.  She was saying a prayer.  I recognized the prayer.  “Eternal Father, I offer you the Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity of my dearly beloved Son, in atonement for their sins, and those of the whole world.”   It was the prayer of mercy that Saint Faustina gave to us.  It was as if she showed me she was the first to pray it, though she without sin, prayed it for us.  She was making an offering of Him for us.  In her humanity, in her pain, she still knew God’s plan was greater and she was offering for us because she was resting in the will of the Father.  She shows us how.  She made the offering for those who were immediately surrounding her, and for all of us.   And Jesus, had given her to John just before He passed.  A Priest at her side while Jesus made the perfect sacrifice, and she too offered Him for us.  The way the church offers Him to us through the Priest at Mass.  And it made me realize the church herself, because she is guided by the Holy Spirit, is resting in the will of the Father and the sins of men shall not prevail against her.  And I wept.

Mary, our Mother, not only said yes to birthing Him, she said yes to giving Him back to the Father so we could be saved by Him.  And I thought about the Mass and how I should want to offer all I have on the altar as well and how the church brings this opportunity to us.    To give back to God what was His to begin with because by doing this it will help me love others the way that He does; the way that His Mother does.  Myself, my spouse, my children, my home, my work, my finances, my fertility, they all belong to Him.  None of it is mine.  I should be making this offering on the altar too, placing all of that there, for His plan for all of it is greater than any plan of mine.  Every single suffering and gift I have had, if I lay it on the altar and offer like Mary did, her son can bring resurrection to my life.   I intellectually know this, but here with this devotion my heart was infused with this knowledge.

All of these devotions we have, they are connected to one another.  The Chaplet of Sorrows connected me to Divine Mercy.  The Sacred Heart, it is Divine Mercy.  The Immaculate Heart brings us Divine Mercy.  This is all linked to the Eucharistic Sacrifice.  This Mercy wants to bring us everlasting life so give all of yourself at Mass, and no matter which devotion you do this Lent, make sure you let Him lead it because He will bring you Mercy, which brings you God’s peace.

Eternal God, in whom mercy is endless and the treasury of compassion — inexhaustible, look kindly upon us and increase Your mercy in us, that in difficult moments we might not despair nor become despondent, but with great confidence submit ourselves to Your holy will, which is Love and Mercy itself.

 

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When Jesus Comes Again

Posted on March 5, 2019 by veilofveronica

holyface1

“Then comes the end, when he hands over the kingdom to his God and Father, when he has destroyed every sovereignty and every authority and power.  For he must reign until he has put all his enemies under his feet. The last enemy to be destroyed is death, for “he subjected everything under his feet.” But when it says that everything has been subjected, it is clear that it excludes the one who subjected everything to him.When everything is subjected to him, then the Son himself will [also] be subjected to the one who subjected everything to him, so that God may be all in all.” 1 Corinthians 24-28

So these are the posts I very much dislike.  God seems to be speaking to me about His second coming.  I know very little about eschatology and the second coming.  I post this because I felt God compel me to speak about it.  Every time I pick up a book to read about these things, I just cannot seem to get through it.  Like God is telling me, STOP.  JUST LISTEN.  So I stop, and I just listen.  If the church came out tomorrow and said all I have written is wrong, I would agree, and take down my writing.  I write what pops into my head in prayer as a letter from God.  I will share with you what He spoke to me today.  What I can most glean from what He says to me is that we are not in the end times.  We have work to do, for our own souls and for future generations.  Too many things haven’t happened for it to be the end times.  I will relay what he spoke to me;

Beloved,

I have told you when I will return.  I came to destroy the works of the devil.  I will hand over the kingdom to my Father when the works of the devil are destroyed.  Every sovereignty and authority under my foot.  That happens when the foot of each human being created in my image and likeness steps on the head of the serpent and domain is restored to where the Father had given it.  Restoration to the Divine Will.  Your Divinization.  A new heaven and a new earth.  The 7th covenant.  Resting in ME.  Resting in MY WILL.  All things a movement towards this, creating the 8th day.  Resurrection of the Body, world without end.  A new beginning.  When this is accomplished it is because I have reached the 4 corners of the earth.  The tribulation you are in is part of the plan, but not the end.  Keep watch.  
There are some among you who will betray.  There are some who will deny.  There are many who will run away.  But behold, I make all things new and work all things for the good OF THOSE WHO LOVE ME.  Many will weep bitterly.
Look upon my HOLY FACE and KNOW what TRUE LOVE IS.  
SHALOM I say to you.
Peace that surpasses understanding. 
Pay attention to the skies.
Pay attention to the maps.
Locations where I have placed my people. 
I have BREATHED UPON YOU, and my spirit rests upon you.  
The ARK carries you.
She is MY MOTHER.
Cling to her the way a babe clings to his mother in the dark of night.
Remember, DO NOT BE AFRAID.
I have chosen you for these times. 
I love you and you are mine.
Pray for perseverance.
Pray for Nashville.
Pray for your Bishop.
Pray for your Priest (a specific one)
 – Your Divine Spouse
There are a few things I want to say about what I have written here.  The first is that we know there were 6 covenants in the bible.  The first was Adam and Eve and the covenant was marriage, Noah was the family, Abraham was the tribe, Moses was the nation, David was the Kingdom, and Jesus’ was for the world.  But we also know 6 is an incomplete number.  The number of completion is 7.  On the 7th day He rested.  We should rest, in the bosom of the Lord.  Everything is a movement back to the Divine Will.  It is a story of Love that God has written.  It is an infusion of Heaven and earth, the way it was before the fall.  We are not there yet.  In fact, we are quite far from there.  Only God knows when we will be there.  But the journey for us is to do the work in front of us, being obedient to God.
I had a moment today.  It was a memory of Eva before she passed away.  She had told me back then she died on the table, she felt the other side.  She said it’s all about forgiveness.  I wept in the hallway at work today at the recollection of this memory.  This is the focus of what we do in deliverance ministry.  We teach people to truly forgive.   It really is all about forgiveness.  Christ will come again when we put our foot on the devil’s head, all of us.  And we do that through Baptism into His Kingdom, living the Sacramental Life, but most of all by forgiving others like Christ did.  This kind of forgiveness is really a Divine Infusion of Grace.  This kind of love, this kind of charity is a gift that we cannot gain on our own.  It is only through God.  It is why I pray for the illumination of conscience.  I pray for this, because this is where we will all see mercy; How we need it, and how we should give it.  Christ is making great Saints.  Saints for a time to dispel the confusion.
This Lent I will focus on the Holy Face of Jesus and ask for the Divine Grace to always forgive as he forgives.
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4 Hearts Sacred and Complete

Posted on March 1, 2019 by veilofveronica

Sacred_clean_single

 So from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view. Though we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer.  Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!  All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation:  that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation.  We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God.   God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God. – 2 Corinthians 16-21

 

My friend James created this for me.  It is the 4 hearts, Sacred Heart of Jesus, Immaculate Heart of Mary, Guardian Heart of Saint Joseph, and the Beloved Heart of you and me.  It is from images that pop in my head that I have had in prayer over time.  At first I saw only 3 hearts.  Sacred, Immaculate, and Beloved (which is my heart and your heart).   Our Lady soon started pointing me towards Joseph and his guardian heart.   I wrote the prayer of the Beloved to the Holy Family.  The beloved heart which belongs to you and me was a broken heart but it was sown back together by Christ with the thorns of suffering, with the helmet of salvation against false ideology that He wore on his head.   Our heart becomes beloved when we understand the love God has for us and stop believing the lies of the accuser.  We rest in the heart of Jesus, which is in the bosom of the Father.  Mary and Joseph, the whole Holy Family lives there. The roses of love blooming from the intercession of His mother.  Originally, I saw one white rose for purity, and one red for love coming off of the Beloved Heart.  But as Mary pointed me to her earthly spouse, the lilies of purity became part of the picture.

I showed this to James well over a year ago.  James had publicly stood next to me in the battle with our Catholic School.  I didn’t know him before that but through that ordeal we prayed a lot.   He has a great love for God.   He recently started Exodus 90 with a group of men.  He also started reading the Manual for Men by Bishop Thomas Olmsted.   He told me something he saw while doing this triggered his memory of my drawing.  Then he created this for me.  Exactly what I saw.  Isn’t God amazing?

These hearts rest in the Divine Will (God willing, mine does).  God’s timing is perfect and I feel as though God is about to do something BIG because he prompted James to create this.  May your heart rest in the Divine Will and may you all have peace and blessings today. My friend Lucy recently sent me this song. I think it portrays how God chases us so our heart will rest in his.

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Christian WAKE UP- A testimony

Posted on February 25, 2019 by veilofveronica

Jesus asleeo in the boat

 

Jesus was inside the boat, sleeping with his head on a pillow. The followers went and woke him. They said, “Teacher, don’t you care about us? We are going to drown!” Jesus stood up and gave a command to the wind and the water. He said, “Quiet! Be still!” Then the wind stopped, and the lake became calm. Mark 4:38-39

 

I know many of you would rather read than watch a video or listen to a podcast, but I urge you to watch this video of my friend Katherine Cantrell.    It is well worth the 26 minutes and will leave you inspired.

Saint Agustine

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The Veil was Torn in Two – The Liturgy

Posted on February 23, 2019 by veilofveronica

ghent altar piece

When Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, He yielded up His spirit.  At that moment the veil of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. The earth quaked and the rocks were split.  The tombs broke open, and the bodies of many saints who had fallen asleep were raised.  Matthew 27:50-52

In my work in deliverance ministry we talk a lot about covenant and how the Jewish people all knew what this was and what was expected of them in covenant.  We know too throughout history that other cultures have partaken in covenants with one another where the pact made with the group is a stronger bond than anything else.  Covenant always requires a blood sacrifice. And in the Catholic Mass, the new covenant celebrates the blood sacrifice of Jesus Christ for our sins. We have all been taught that, but I am not sure many have any idea of what that actually means.

The first time we actually see a blood sacrifice in the bible is in the story of Adam and Eve.

The Lord God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife, and clothed them. Genesis 3:21

Up until to this point Adam and Eve would not have known death.  But here, with the Lord Himself clothing them in garments of skin, we know an animal was sacrificed.  The Lord Himself was showing them how to worship. How to bring themselves back into union with Him. It required sacrifice.

Prior to the Lord clothing them, he had pronounced curses upon them.  To the woman;

“I will greatly multiply your pain in childbirth, In pain you will bring forth children; Yet your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.” Genesis 3:16

And to the man;

Because you have listened to the voice of your wife, and have eaten from the tree about which I commanded you, saying, ‘You shall not eat from it’; Cursed is the ground because of you; in toil you will eat of it all the days of your life. “Both thorns and thistles it shall grow for you; and you will eat the plants of the field; by the sweat of your face you will eat bread, till you return to the ground, because from it you were taken; For you are dust, And to dust you shall return.” Genesis 3:17-19

One could read these statements and conclude that God is harsh and unloving, even though we know that God had given them the chance to repent, and instead of repenting they started blaming.  But to our modern eyes, we misunderstand what God was doing here.

You see, God, IS LOVE.  When the two of them listened to the serpent, it was an offense against LOVE HIMSELF, and an act borne of envy and pride.   It was an act of death.

God, even in His curses upon them, was showing them how to LOVE again.  For the woman, her pain in childbirth, in pain you will bring forth children; this is not just in the physical act of labor, but in bearing them throughout her whole life, the connection she has to her child.  The kind of love that is hard to understand because the bond is spiritual and lasting. And the prayers of a mother for a child have more efficacy than any other prayer. Likewise, a wife submitting to her husband, because of love for him, these two things get her outside of herself and looking at the other.  It also restores the authority God had given to Adam, but was never meant to be used to Lord it over her. Sure, we as humans have twisted this, but God here again, this “curse” was trying to teach us about Love, and in a spiritual view can be seen as a blessing.

For the man, God is reinstating his authority and his ability to provide for and protect the people in his care.  And the hard work the man will have to do in order to achieve this, it gets him outside of himself to provide for his wife and his family.  Anyone who has seen a man out of work sees the depression and anxiety it causes, men thrive when they can provide and protect. The toil of his hard work is not for himself, but for others.  It too is a blessing, but too often we twist this as well.

The whole of everything God was trying to teach us, even in the curses He pronounced, was all about LOVE.  How to LOVE. His sacrifice of the animal to clothe them, showed them how to commune with Him, and we see sacrifice in worship from this point forward.  His Son was sent because man, of their own accord, couldn’t redeem themselves. Jesus was sent out of love. A friend of mine recently explained it this way;

“First, Christ is the Son of the Father – but not in the way of men.  The Father is God. The Son is God. The Holy Spirit is God. All three persons are one in being with each other (consubstantial) and are all eternal.  Thus, while Jesus is truly the Son of God, the Father is the Father of God, and the Holy Spirit is the Holy Spirit of God. So it is not that God sent His Son to be tortured and die; rather, the eternal God came, Himself, to be tortured and die by taking on our humanity in the person of the eternal Son.”

This shows us THE LOVE OF GOD.  It has always been about LOVE.

So this brings me to the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass.  The worship we do on Sunday has inexhaustible fruits that are measured by our inward disposition.  Jesus’ Sacrifice present at every mass holds the infinite opportunity for perfection and holiness to be poured out upon us, but the measure of the graces we receive is the measure of our faith and of our love.  Faith is the prompt and complete donation of our entire selves to God, to His Will and service. Mass is actually a practice of the virtue of JUSTICE. We give back to God LOVE, getting outside of ourselves, for HIM, which also leads us outside of ourselves for OTHERS.  This is NOT A FEELING, it is from the depths of our soul.

During the Holy Sacrifice, the Epiclesis prayer calls down the Holy Spirit, and the Anamnesis prayer reaching back in time to bring us the Sacrifice of Christ.  This Sacrificial Act which was taught to us by God HIMSELF shows us how to bring ourselves back in union with God. And what greater union can we obtain than for the Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity of Christ to be consumed into our very being; uniting both our body and soul to Jesus.

The Mass is where we give God HIS DUE through our participation in the Holy Sacrifice.  We give God our LOVE and he unites it with HIS OWN. As participators in the Holy Sacrifice, and not merely spectators, we give our very selves to God, offering our own lives, just as Jesus offered His life for the Father on the cross. 

Too often the Liturgy gets humanized to be about US, and what we will get out of it. When it should be about HIM and offering ourselves to Him as Sacrifice.  When we do this we are more fully receive the gifts of HIS LOVE that enable us to go out and LOVE OTHERS as He did, with Self Sacrificing Love. Likewise, if we get too wrapped up in the legalism of the Mass and nitpick our fellow man to death on their posture, we also miss the point.

When we bring worldly matters to the Mass, like worldly equality or self-focused ideology, we miss the understanding that God’s equality is an equality of DIGNITY, which highlights the fact that we are all made in the image and likeness of God.  With this we are all equal in our dignity, which is how our Creator sees us, but we are uniquely different as well. In looking at our neighbor in this way, we begin to understand that differences in people are actually a gift. The differences in male and female, the different ways the Holy Spirit uses us, all of these things are gifts. Unfortunately, people on both sides of the spectrum are putting people in boxes of our own design with labels that alienate and will actually lead to hatred.  

The Mass IS is heaven on earth.  We have the Latin term, Lex credendi, lex orandi, how we pray reveals what we believe. And vice versa; What we believe will dictate how we pray. When we worship and pray for love of Him and believe with all of our hearts, it spills over into the outside world.  Jesus does not change when we worship, he is absolute truth and unchanging, we change when we worship, and when we believe in the Eucharist, which He is present in, He changes us.  He is present whether we believe or not, but our belief, our prayer and our worship is how we become changed into what God wants us to be.  I have stated before, God does not need the Liturgy, He is perfect.  We need it to unite us to Him in the most Holy Eucharist.  Receiving with faith in transubstantiation transforms us, it divinizes us. 

I urge us all to go to Mass with a new outlook, by placing Christ truly at the center of the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass.  By letting go of our own desires and wants for what the Mass should or should not be and instead, with your whole heart, give God his due in worship; we should focus on Christ instead of the people around us, whom we cannot control.  By participating in the sacrifice taking place through your own gift of self, offering up all your cares, all your worries to the one who has the power to SAVE YOU. This is what will put Christ above all else and will allow us to truly love HIM, as he leads us to view others the way that HE DOES, which is in LOVE.  

The Mass has a specific rubric in which we are to follow.  As with all things that our Holy Mother Church gives us, this was handed down to us as such in order for us to keep our eyes on Christ; so that we will worship out of LOVE of GOD and desire to give him his proper due, which is right and just.  Intentional operation outside of the rubric comes from a Spirit of Rebellion and is not of God. Intentional operation in legalism is actually a Spirit of Control over others, and is not of God. Both of those Spirits seek division. God unites, and when our interior understands this, we are better able to love others the way that God loves us.  Everything a movement from our union with Christ at Mass into a union of the Body of Christ in the outside world.

When the veil was torn in two when Jesus died, it not only opened heaven for us, but it also gave us the ability to see with Spiritual Eyes.  The death and resurrection of Christ didn’t just raise the dead to heaven, it brought and brings heaven on earth when we embrace it. It enables us to see what God sees, and to love like he does.  Unite yourself to Christ at Mass, receive what He wants to give you, and it will be you who is transformed from the inside out. You will become a light in the darkness and be a conduit of change in others.

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Mercy and Justice

Posted on February 22, 2019 by veilofveronica

800px-Nicolas_Colombel_-_Christ_Healing_the_Blind

And they came to Beth-sa′ida. And some people brought to him a blind man, and begged him to touch him.  And he took the blind man by the hand, and led him out of the village; and when he had spit on his eyes and laid his hands upon him, he asked him, “Do you see anything?”  And he looked up and said, “I see men; but they look like trees, walking.”  Then again he laid his hands upon his eyes; and he looked intently and was restored, and saw everything clearly.  And he sent him away to his home, saying, “Do not even enter the village.” Mark 8:22-26 RSV

BY: ASHLEY BLACKBURN

I often read the daily readings and pray with them using lectio divina as I reflect on not only the larger theme of the readings, but also what God wants to teach me through them.  Often times, I read through them and then don’t really have anything that sticks out to me at first. So this is when I say a quick prayer and ask God to reveal to me what He wants me to hear from these readings.  After I do this… it is as if scripture opens up and a whole new world of wisdom and understanding begins to blossom in my mind and in my heart. The readings from Wednesday of this week (Feb 20, 2019) were one of those occasions.  At first, I felt nothing was sticking out to me, then I said my prayer and God revealed something to me that I thought was relevant to share to a wider audience.

The gospel was Mark 8:22-26.  In this passage, Jesus heals a blind man in two stages. We must realize that this blind man was living in complete darkness.  He could not see anything. How many of us are or were living in spiritual darkness at one point or another in our lives, I know that I was for a time.  The blind man is brought to Jesus, which means he was brought with the help of his friends or family. This is a reminder to us that those in our lives who are living in darkness, those who are NOT living with the light of Christ in their lives, can be brought to Jesus (spiritually) by you and me through prayer.  We can lift these souls up to heaven on their behalf and ask the Lord to bring them out of the darkness… to heal their blindness.

In the gospel story, the first stage of the man’s healing was when Jesus spits on his eyes and lays his hands upon him.  Then Jesus asks him if he can see anything. The blind man says “I see men; but they look like trees, walking”. This line here is where God stopped me in my reading of this passage. There was something very peculiar about what this man says.  He says he sees men, but they look like trees, and they are walking!? What in the world? Such a weird thing to say, but it was included in the bible, so we know that it is the inspired Word of God. After reflecting on this further, I realized that this was only the first stage of healing for the blind man and it only gave him a partial view. He said he could see man, he knew they were walking, but he said they looked like trees.  This is a distortion of what was really there. We must not discount the fact that the man was no longer in darkness. He could SEE. This in and of itself was a miracle. But what he was seeing was distorted.  

I began to reflect even more upon this reality… that there is something such as a partial healing.  And then God showed me when in my life I was partially healed. As I said previously, there was a time in my life when I was living in complete darkness.  I was not recognizing God’s presence in my life, thus I was not walking with him in the light. Then through the prayers of my parents and family, and through the mercy of God, I was lifted up out of my darkness and brought into the light.  But this was only a partial healing. For I too had a distorted view of reality. I was living in duplicity. Sure, I was reconciled back with God and I began walking with Him, but I was still not willing to surrender ALL of my old ways and habits to Him.  I held on to some things that I considered to be justifiable in my own relative view of what was right and what was wrong. I didn’t consider learning the truth of the Church or seeking full forgiveness where I was still living in sin, because I had convinced myself that these things were not all that bad. Afterall, God is merciful!  I could have stayed in this spiritual place, reconciled and believing in God, but continuing to walk in distortion, but God called me deeper.  Deeper into truth.

If we go back to the gospel reading we see that after the man explains to Jesus what he can see, which was a distorted view, Jesus laid his hands upon the man’s eyes a second time.  This time the man looked “intently” and he was “restored” and he “saw everything clearly”. The second stage of this man’s healing was not done until he surrendered his view to Jesus.  After the first time Jesus laid his hand on the man’s eyes, he could have told Jesus, “Yes I can SEE!” and walked away. This would have been a true statement. He could now see. But instead we see the man tell Jesus WHAT he saw.  He surrendered what he was now seeing to Jesus… He was open and honest with Jesus, allowing Him to determine what further healing was needed. Once the blind man tells Jesus what he saw, Jesus is then able to heal him of his distorted view. He is able to pull the veil back even further so that the blind man could see in full view the TRUE reality of what was around him.  

Our ultimate goal in seeking full union with God is to be able to see the world as God sees it, to think as God does, to act as God does.  If we look at the readings for today (Feb 21, 2019), Jesus rebukes Peter for thinking as human beings do and not as God does. And how does God see, and think and act? With MERCY and JUSTICE. All of us must get past our cloudy view of the world and the people in it. The way that we do this is by seeking FULL healing in our own lives first. This can only be done through a complete surrender of our view to Jesus.  We must speak honestly and openly with Jesus. Asking him to show us the fullness of the Truth, so that we may live it in our daily lives. If we hold anything back from God, then we will never be completely healed. We will remain in our sin, we will remain in our distorted view, where we will not be able to see clearly as God does.

For me, I remained in this stage of being partially healed for many years.  Not until I began listening to God and OBEYING HIM instead of my own desires, was I able to get on the path of full healing.  Although I would not consider myself fully healed at this point, I do know that God is gently working with me, leading me step by step along this path.  I am not sure how long this journey will be for me, but I do know that my desires have changed and I now desire to do the Will of God in all things.

In the first reading from Wednesday’s daily readings, the promise that God made to Noah after the flood is that God will never curse the earth because of human beings again.  We may be tempted to sin and may give in and act on it in our lives, but God is always going to be standing there with his hand outstretched to us, offering us full healing for our lives.  He wants nothing more than to pull us up out of our confusion, out of our distorted view, and bring us into the fullness of the light of the Truth. We must only reach our hand out to His so that He can pull us up out of our state in life and into his Merciful Love.

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Your Prayer Matters

Posted on February 15, 2019 by veilofveronica

800px-Joan_of_Arc_Emmanuel_Fremiet

“Prayer is the best weapon we have; it is the key to God’s heart. You must speak to Jesus not only with your lips, but with your heart. In fact on certain occasions you should only speak to Him with your heart.” – Saint Padre Pio

I had another dream on Wednesday night.  In the dream I was on my knees praying the Rosary.  Then God lifted the veil and he showed me what my prayer was doing.  I saw myself holding a sword, slaying demons.  Then I awoke remembering an old journal I had.  God wanted me to remember it.

This journal was one that I kept long before I started journaling letters to God.  It was simply a journal of my petitions for others.  The petitions in them were huge.  A sampling of some of the prayers;

For my friend who is infertile to have children.

For my relative who is infertile to have children.

For my relative who is an alcoholic to recover.

I could go on.  But you get the idea.  These were no small petitions.  And one by one I realized all had been answered.  My friend was able to conceive biological children.  My relative was able to adopt.  My other relative went in to rehab and has been a recovered alcoholic for years.  As I looked at each petition, there was only one that wasn’t answered the way I would have wanted.  That one, where I asked for healing for a friend, ended in earthly death.  But even with that, God whispered, “she is healed.”  

I realized how short sighted I am.  I had written them down, prayed them for awhile, and forgotten about them and moved on to the next thing that seemed an anxiety in my life or the life of others.  It wasn’t until later on my journey that gratitude became part of my prayer.  Gratitude even in suffering.  For the infertile couples who had to wait, the gratefulness for children is all the sweeter.  We in our impatience want what we want now, but God has a larger plan, that when we pray and trust it, brings us joy beyond measure.

There is something else I want to point out too.  I truly believe God does want to prosper us and not to harm us.  He is a good Father and we are sons and daughters of a King.  Prayer is how we come into union with Him.  In our weakness we pray simply not to suffer, but if our prayer becomes one of uniting our will to His will, life becomes more joyful and filled with gratitude.  We must pray with our hearts.  It slays demons.

I noticed people either do not believe in the demonic, or if they do they are terrified of it. I know for a fact we have an active entity seeking to destroy us.  I have witnessed it.  God is not the one who wills all the evil we see.  We must realize the devil is real, but in this realization we must not fear.  You often see depictions in movies of a person shaking while they hold a cross when confronted with a demon.  The demon throws the cross, because it is painful for the demon to touch, and he just wants it out of the way, and then the demon goes after the person who is afraid.  But I say NO to that.  We must get angry at the demons.  We must have a Holy Hatred.

We should be totally angry, and have active enmity at the devil that he came to steal, kill and destroy.  And we can claim our victory in Jesus Christ and tell that demon to go straight back to hell.  Demons of depression, fear, anxiety, rage, bitterness, they have no right inside your domain, your circle of authority.   But one thing to remember is the demons won’t leave unless you have forgiven.

“Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.”

If we can forgive others all offenses the way Jesus forgave us, we can, in His Holy Name command demons to leave us alone.  When we pray and unite our will with God’s will, He gives us the grace to forgive and love like he does, to see people the way He does.  And this, this is what makes us WARRIORS.  We are the Church Militant and our mission, to love, to forgive, and to put the devil under our own feet in the name of Jesus.

The Rosary is particularly powerful in this regard if it is prayed from the heart because it shows us the uniting of Mary with her Son.  I came across this picture that depicts Mary in prayer;

Rosa Mystica

(Rosa Mistica by Francesco Laporta Valor –  1894 )

Take a look at that look on her face.  Her hands are folded in prayer, but that look is not one of passivity.  That is a look reserved for Satan, that says, “DON’T MESS WITH ME OR MY CHILDREN, I WILL CRUSH YOUR HEAD.”  

You see Mary, by uniting her will with God, KNOWS WHO THE ENEMY IS.  It isn’t other people, whom we must love, but it is Satan, the liar and the accuser.

When I was on my retreat a couple of weeks ago, I went on a walk in the woods.  I came across a statue of Mary standing on the serpent;

crush-serpent

I lifted my own foot and stepped on his head too.  For Jesus came to destroy the works of the devil (1 John 3:8), yet we see the devils works everywhere.  But I say, in my life, I unite my will to Christ.  I step on your head, you filthy serpent, and allow Christ to lift me out of weakness into perfection, through prayer, sacraments, forgiveness and holy hatred of the one who came to destroy.  It is only in relying on my Savior that I can be lifted.  I cannot save myself.  Prayer unites me to Him who alone is good.  And this unites us with each other, who understand this, making the Communion of Saints truly a Mystical Body of Christ.

“Then comes the end, when he hands over the kingdom to his God and Father, when he has destroyed every sovereignty and every authority and power.  For he must reign until he has put all his enemies under his feet. The last enemy to be destroyed is death, for “he subjected everything under his feet.” But when it says that everything has been subjected, it is clear that it excludes the one who subjected everything to him.When everything is subjected to him, then the Son himself will [also] be subjected to the one who subjected everything to him, so that God may be all in all.” 1 Corinthians 24-28

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The Helmet of Salvation

Posted on February 12, 2019 by veilofveronica

HelmetOfThornsDaninBotanyP59X865

Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. Ephesians 6:17

 

When I was on retreat at Bethany House a week ago, we decided to do the Stations of the Cross, which are outdoors along a pathway through the woods.  I was assigned the task of carrying the crucifix.  Because of the placement of the stations I ended up holding the crucifix in front of me at about chest level.  I got a bird’s eye view of the top of Jesus’ head.  And I remembered reading an article about how the crown of thorns actually covered the whole of his head and wasn’t just a circular band around his head.  And God whispered, “the helmet of Salvation.”

A bit taken aback, I pondered what this meant.  And God said, “your minds are under assault by the enemy.  But I crush the serpent, I want you too as well.”  

I thought about all the false ideology that is shot at us like poison arrows.  Confusion about when life begins.  Confusion about marriage.  Confusion about gender.  Confusion about love.  Confusion about our own identity.  Confusion in the church.  He took it all on.  Each of those thorns in his scalp a representation of false ideology that he was overcoming.  He took it all on so we would know truth.  We must live in the spirit of truth.

The person with the Spirit makes judgments about all things, but such a person is not subject to merely human judgments, for,“Who has known the mind of the Lord so as to instruct him?” But we have the mind of Christ. 1 Corinthians 2:15-16

Today, my heart felt heavy, as if the winds of the world are about to become fierce.  But even in the midst of this I felt consoled.  God tells me all is a movement towards His Divine Will.  He is urgent about aligning my own personal human will with his will.

 “that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me.” John 17:21

The fighting, hatred, fear and detraction have become our way of living, and it is a false way of living.  And so He tells me “Be not afraid, put on the armor of God.”

I woke up in the night with a book on my heart.  The book is called Praying as a family.  All I know is God is urgent that we pray and pray together with others as well.

We need to ask for the intercession of Mary and Joseph to help us align our will to Christ’s as they did.  God is making everything transparent.  And on this the Feast of Our Lady of Lourdes the Immaculate Conception will be our guide to the will of her Son whatever happens around us.

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Full of Grace

Posted on February 4, 2019 by veilofveronica

Joseph

 

“….having been associated, as Mother and Minister, with the King of martyrs in the ineffable work of human Redemption, she is always associated, with a practically measureless power, in the distribution of the graces that derive from the Redemption…. And her kingdom is as vast as that of her Son and God, since nothing is excluded from her dominion.” – Pius XII, Radiomessage to Fatima, Bendito seia, May 13, 1946

I went on a silent retreat this weekend at the beautiful Bethany House.  I had really needed it, to fill back up.  The bickering and the fighting in the world, it can get you down.  This was my trip to the mountain top to pray.  It was very healing.

I have to say though, this post is not one I wanted to write.  Whenever God shows me something, I always try to discern if it is just for me or if it is something I should share.  I would prefer many times not to share, and I had decided that what happened this weekend in my prayer was one of those times it was just for me.  But no sooner had I decided it, than God said, “SPEAK.”  This is actually the word I got for the year from Jennifer Fulwiler’s word of the year generator.   Lord Jesus, I feel like a lamenting Jeremiah.  But, alas I will listen.

The reason I am so reluctant to write this is because it is a private revelation to me in private prayer.  If the magisterium of the church came out tomorrow and stated what I have written is false, then the church would be correct, and I would be wrong and fooled.  So know that as you discern what I write.

To start, I have to back up to May of 2018, because it is actually a sequence of things I have been shown in prayer.  The only way I can describe what happens is like this;  I will close my eyes in prayer, and in my minds eye I feel as though I am transported to another time and another place, though I am not really.   Last May I had just written Saint Joseph terror of demons, a few weeks earlier, and I was at a Sunday morning Mass not really thinking about that.   I came back from communion and the children’s choir was singing Gentle Woman.  I had a direct line view of the statue of Saint Joseph.  I looked at him, knelt down and closed my eyes to pray.  I found myself in a place looking at a young man in maybe his 30’s, arms outstretched to the sky, surrounded in light.  He was sobbing and crying and giving his all to God.  He was totally surrendering.  It was so overwhelming to me I also started to cry.  It was actually breathtakingly beautiful.  Then Mary said to me, “that is Joseph.”  I really felt like I was witnessing the moment Joseph surrendered all he had to God.  I opened my eyes after what was probably only a minute but felt longer, and I was back at Mass ready for the closing prayer.

Then a couple of weeks ago, probably in December, my friend Ashley and I decided to stay after daily Mass and pray a Rosary.  Ashley’s baby is about 5 months old, and in order to give her a break I told her I would hold him while we said the Rosary.  I stood up with him, and I did the mom sway back and forth, as I held him close to my chest.  At a certain point during the Rosary he tucked his head in between my cheek and my neck, and dozed off to sleep.  His fuzzy soft head nestled snugly.  At the time, I was staring at another statue of Saint Joseph, holding the baby Jesus.  I closed my eyes while praying.  I again felt transported.  This time I could see Mary holding the baby Jesus in her arms.  His head tucked on her neck the same way my friend’s baby was on mine.  It was hot.  She had sweat on her brow.  There was a dirt floor.  But she was singing a lullaby to him.  And it was so beautiful and so overwhelming because you could palpably feel the love.  Again I teared up.  I felt like I was being shown an intimate moment.  I opened my eyes and continued the Rosary, thanking God for showing me the beauty.

So fast forward to this weekend.  It was Friday night, the Vigil of the Presentation.  We had a Priest give us a talk and some scripture to meditate on.  But he also told us he wanted us to meditate on the word Intimate.  He said God wanted to be intimate with us.  We began prayer with this as our task.  Before I closed my eyes I looked at the picture of Saint Joseph in front of me (pictured above). I closed my eyes, praying to the Lord asking him about intimacy with me.  But that wasn’t what he showed me.  And again, for the third time I felt transported.  This time I was in the same home, with the same dirt floor.  Mary was holding Jesus in her arms.  But Joseph was there.  He kissed Mary on the forehead, and held her and Jesus in his arms.  He looked at them with such intense love it again made me cry.  God was showing me an intimate moment between them.   Now before anyone goes off the rails, I want to be clear;  This was NOT SEXUAL.  NOT AT ALL.  She is Ever-Virgin.  What transpired next is what I felt God tell me during this time;

Joseph is very aware of his role as Guardian and Protector of Mary and Jesus.  He kissed her with affection and total knowledge of her grace, which was extended to him by God when Joseph said yes to God’s plan and listened to the angel.  From the moment the angel addressed Mary as Full of Grace, she became the Mediatrix of Grace.  She prayed for Joseph during the time that he wanted to divorce her.  Mary desired for his perfection.  Joseph was already a righteous man, built from his habits and his love for God.  After his dream, he totally consented to the plan of God and he was full of grace from that moment forward.  Restored to union; to Jesus through Mary Mediatrix of all Grace.  We know from tradition that John the Baptist was cleansed from original sin when he leapt in Elizabeth’s womb.  It is why scripture tells us, no one born of woman is greater than John.  Her first acts as Mediatrix of all Grace were to extend grace to her earthly spouse and to a child in the womb.  Her role, to bring all to union with her Son, starting with a child and a spouse.  A spouse to whose authority she submitted.  Joseph does not want her body, he knows the sanctity of her and it’s as if glancing at her with the child Jesus takes him into the whirlwind like Job.  He cannot even speak of the immensity of it.  So, in the quiet of his heart, he adores his foster Son.  He loves his Mother, truly.  It’s an intimacy most do not understand because most can’t get past the physical.

I pressed God further about this.  I said, “Joseph became full of grace?” Jesus answered me and said, “do you not think my home, where I would be raised, would not be surrounded in pure virtue? All good comes from God alone, all grace from God flows through my mother.  The Almighty calls you to participate in your divinization.  My mother is the greatest example of this.”

I asked further about Joseph, and the fact that who I saw was young, not the old man often depicted.  And this is what I wrote from that conversation.   Joseph was young.  It was not sexual because once one has tasted the immensity of union with God, everything else pales in comparison.  It’s like when Aquinas called his work “straw”, all else falls away in nothingness and is not needed.  Men, in their limitations, constructed Joseph to be old, not because he was, but because they could not comprehend, nor did they KNOW the magnanimity of God, of union with God.  It is a mystery that can make an intellectual giant like Aquinas stop writing because of the nothingness of his writing in comparison.  Not many achieve this gaze of love, so we can only relate through our limited physical desires and we denigrate the holy ones who overcame them by the grace of God, placing on them limitations that God Himself has removed.  Once you’re infused with the gaze of love the desire becomes God alone and all pure virtue flows through you.  Joseph attained this because of her openness and his habitual virtue.  The original Hebrew word for woman could be translated as “to be open”.   We know too that the Hebrew word for womb came to be known as mercy.  Mary was open, open to mercy Himself.  Mary was open to receiving God, and as such is a Mediatrix of Grace and the conduit for her earthly spouse to attain that unity with God her son.  Joseph adored at the tabernacle that held the King.  They are the model of the Domestic Church and it is in the Domestic Church, when it is properly ordered that true love resides, and faith hope and charity should be lived.  The sacramental life starts in your homes.

I cried at how little I had understood spousal love.  At how much I have tried to control my husband.  And how much of my femininity I had lost in trying to control things instead of letting God do what God does.  In that time between the angel appearing to Mary and the angel appearing to Joseph, we do not see Mary yelling at Joseph trying to convince him of it.  She wasn’t lamenting that she is super holy and he just isn’t as spiritually far a long as she is.  What we see is Mary accepting God’s plan, and trusting it.  And in doing this, Mary let God be God, and she became a conduit of Joseph’s sanctification.

I have spoken to you before about the man hating spirit, but there is also a woman hating spirit.   This woman hating spirit was born of abuse of women over centuries I believe.  But in it’s seeming effort to elevate women, it actually denigrates them by denying all that is feminine.  Children and the womb are looked at with disdain.  Authority gets stolen.  I realized that for far too long I had bought into what the culture has become and I did not breathe life into myself and all that I am created to be as the daughter of a King.  I try to control too much.  It is precisely when we try to control someone that the fighting begins.  It is like running into battle alone, when God says, “be still, I will fight for you.”  If we breathe love and life into another person, and PRAY for them and wait, God will do the work.  Sometimes he does it on them, and sometimes it’s you that needs it.  This is why we need to totally surrender.

God longs for us to have the communion that Mary, Joseph and Jesus did.  It extends to the communion of Saints.  It looks like a Mystical Body that is glorious and healthy.  I knew in an instant that my mission on this earth is to pour love into my spouse.  And also to pray more ardently for our Priests, who bring us the Eucharist.  This is the fruit of my prayer with Mary.  To love others more, to pray for them more, so that her Son can bring more people to Salvation.  This year I drew Saint Faustina as my Saint for the year, with the intention of growing in deeper union with God.  I think Faustina has been speaking with Mary,  the Saint of mercy and the Mother of Mercy, both drawing me to closer union with my Lord and Savior.  Praise be to God.

 

 

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The Man-Hating Spirit

Posted on January 28, 2019 by veilofveronica

man and woman

 

that we would not be outwitted by Satan; for we are not ignorant of his designs. 2 Corinthians 2:11

 

The man-hating spirit is everywhere now (so is the woman hating, but that’s for another article).  It’s a palpable, tangible presence.  I know because it has attacked me before.  And when it does, bitterness and resentment seep into everything.  But I have become aware that it is an actual entity that is attacking.  When you know this, you can change.

If you look around you can see this man hating spirit in society.  Men and women who God created complimentary to work together, are tearing each other apart.  This post is focusing on the women’s role in tearing down men.

Many years back I remember living in this place.  I remember working, doing laundry, doing dishes, and having babies sitting on my hip, and I remember being angry.   The physicality of it is exhausting.  I directed that rage at the men around me, especially my husband.  To me it was “their fault“.  I was bitter and resentful and I was probably a pain to be around.  This was before my friend Veronica was murdered.  This was before I had the deep realization of God.  But even back then, God was chasing me.

One day I remember sitting at my sink, a toddler at my feet, and dirt on the floor.  I was looking at the dishes and I was MAD.  I looked up outside my kitchen window, trash left by the kids in the backyard, I sighed and looked up at the sun.  And a voice in my head clearly said to me, “what are you so mad about?”  I answered, “look at all this mess, no one helps me!”  The voice said, “if you didn’t have that mess you wouldn’t have people who loved you living here.”  I honestly felt like I got slapped in the face.  I sat there stunned.  I started to cry.  My priorities were all screwed up.  I had let the perfection of the world, which is about appearance and material things, seep into my brain; And I had forgotten about the perfection of God, the virtues my parents had taught me about.

From that day forward I made a concerted effort to be kind to my husband when he came home from work.  It was amazing how my kindness made him want to come home from work.  Breathing life into someone, it changes them, and it changes you.  It wasn’t perfect virtue, and still isn’t, but it was a movement towards God, and wanting the best for my husband, wanting for his salvation, and not just mine.

As I have travelled this journey and grown closer to God, I feel like He has revealed how disordered things are in our society.  I do believe God gave men authority, as head of the household, but men have used authority (at the devil’s prodding) to “Lord it over” women.  Women have gotten angry and have rebelled (at the devil’s prodding).  And now here we sit in a society filled with hatred of men.

The relationship of man and woman was meant to be complimentary.  Man as the head of the household, and the woman helping him, because when she does, it helps her, and it puts 10,000 demons to flight.  When a couple comes together, the power of God is seen.  I was talking to my friend Ashley the other day.  We spoke about how many women struggle with husbands who aren’t as faithful to God as they are, or problems even bigger than that.  Ashley always tries to look at things from the perspective of the Blessed Mother.  Here is what she said;

Where men are unable to hear and operate in their authority, the spirit descends upon the women and the women must then pray for the men.  Mary received the spirit at the Annunciation.  Then she prayed for Joseph.  Joseph then began listening and had the dream from the angel, to take Mary as his wife and the other dream to flee to Egypt.  He was acting upon the authority that was given him from God—-to lead Mary and Jesus.  Then once Joseph dies, Mary must take back that authority of the family and finish raising her Son.  At the Wedding at Cana we see her giving the authority to her Son.  She then was under Jesus’ authority after that.  Then at the foot of the cross she was given to John.  So John was to lead Mary for the rest of her earthly life.  It is a beautiful flow of the spirit of authority from one person to the next in the story of Jesus.  So too with us.  Where the man lacks authority, the woman will receive the spirit and lead.  But we must do what Mary did and pray for the man.  When we pray, their hearts can become open for them to listen to God’s messages and lead… taking back that God-given authority with women being vessels of it until they are ready.  We see with this that the darkness will not overcome the light of the human race.

We have had years of women who have suffered at the hands of men.  This post is not meant to belittle their pain.  This is actually about healing.  Instead of trying to dominate over men we should be praying ardently for them.  God’s authority can be given as He sees fit.  He gave it first to Adam, who was to be the keeper and protector.  When they fell in the garden, he blamed her, she blamed the serpent, and death entered the world.  Stop blaming.  Start praying.  Prayer begets unity, the unity we are all seeking.  And let us also remember mercy.  Mercy is the key to permanence in relationship.  God extends us His mercy, we must do the same.

Did you ever wonder why the Angel appeared to Joseph?  I mean, if God did not intend him to have any authority in the matter, why bother?  But God knew Mary needed Joseph.  And Mary knew she did too.  That’s why when he takes them to flee to Egypt she doesn’t object.  She doesn’t say, NO I won’t listen to you.  She listens and respects his authority.  And Jesus, he was under Joseph’s authority too.  They worked together in harmony.  That’s why they are the hearts in unison.

Today we are in an intense battle.  The man-hating spirit is actually in the atmosphere.  You can feel it when you walk into places.  But just because you feel it, doesn’t mean you should embrace it.  Our spirit is deeper than our feelings.  Hand those to God, and pray for better men.  When a man feels supported and loved, he can actually do what he is supposed to do, and we women will receive what we have been longing for from our men.

One more thing, when a woman dishonors her husband, in front of children, this does astronomical damage to the children. Half of who they are comes from him.  If you want to breed self-hatred in your children, this is how you do it.  Love is sometimes difficult.  Some would say it’s impossible, but that’s why God is asking for us to rely on Him, because nothing is impossible with God.

 

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